Cod Almighty | Diary

Diary - Thursday 13 March 2003

13 March 2003

In this season of outrageous fortune, the latest sling and/or arrow to pierce Town's frail armour is the news that Michael Boulding - the only player on the books who knows how to score goals - could require surgery on his troublesome ankle that would sideline him for flipping ages. The player is to consult a specialist this week to determine the full extent of the injury, which has already excluded him from the Mariners' last two games. Town's official site points out that the ankle in question is not the one that forced Boulding out of action in February; while BBC Humber Sport gloomily and rather mysteriously suggests: "Nobody is saying, but the suggestion is that there are worries at Blundell Park that Boulding might need an operation which could jeopardise the rest of his season."

And if further evidence is needed that the fates are not merely conspiring against the Mariners this season but are already crouched behind a grassy knoll with a loaded rifle, Alan Pouton has been banned for four games following his second red card of the season against Sheffield United - and may miss a further two matches as the FA considers a disrepute charge. On 27 March the ruling body will consider lengthening Pouton's ban in punishment for throwing a captain's armband loaded with anthrax at a linesman following his first red card of the season (which was in a 3-0 defeat against Preston at Deepdale, not a 3-3 draw, as Town's official site has it).

Today's trialist news comes in an email to the Diary from Cod Almighty match reporter Tony Butcher, who is anxious to correct the impression given on this page yesterday that Leeds striker Michael Ward played some part in Tuesday night's reserves game against Scarborough. The player didn't actually come off the bench, says Tony, adding: "Well, he did, to go to the toilet and have a little jog up the touchline, but he absolutely did not 'get on'. Which is a great shame as he has Premiership hair, a sort of haystack Alan Smith." (Mr Butcher also informs us that Jonathan Rowan "ran around for 4 minutes," and states pointedly: "No Wayne Gill.") Many thanks for that, TB; looks like the Diary was a bit premature with its source.

Finance now, and the Football League has been forced to deny that its current internet deal could follow the same ignominious course as its last TV deal. Some recent reports have suggested that struggling cable firm NTL (the Diary refuses to recognise the trendy lower-case trade names) was about to pull the plug on Premium TV, its subsidiary firm that gives money to clubs in exchange for letting it fill their websites with adverts for betting shops; but league spokesman Ian Christon has rejected the stories, insisting: "There has been no indication that Premium is on verge of collapse." In a scenario all too familiar to anyone who has worked in new media, the deal has already been restructured once owing to cashflow problems, giving clubs a percentage of future income rather than money up front. The collapse of the Premium deal would leave Football League clubs - still reeling from their nauseating treatment by the scumsucking lowlife of Granada and Carlton TV - out of pocket by a further £35m.