Cod Almighty | Diary

Diary - Monday 16 February 2004

16 February 2004

Graham "Rodgers" Rodger's stock has risen in the Grimsby Telegraph's manager prediction game after Saturday's 2-1 win over Brighton. Keith Alexander's name was the one on Riby Square lips last week, but after the Lincoln board moved quickly to wave a new contract at him and Town overcame official ineptitude at the weekend to record a first victory for two and a bit months (as opposed to the four months claimed in today's Telegraph), the paper is today discussing the possibility of Grezza's caretakership extending to a permanent appointment. Chairman Pete has declared that 30 applications have so far been received, including CVs from former Oldham and Huddersfield manager Mick Wadsworth and one-time Mariners hero Kevin Drinkell, who always applies for it, and once got Stirling Albion promoted but never quite cracked it with Montrose. Alan Buckley's pride has so far prevented him from applying, and the Telegraph says Nicky Law was sighted in the Upper Stones on Saturday. Cod Almighty would oppose the appointment of the latter on the grounds that the entire population of North East Lincolnshire would call him "Laws," bringing back far too many very bad memories.

After frequently lamenting the blandness of Paul Groves' pre- and post-match interviews, the Diary is encouraged to note the more enlightening nature of Rodger's utterances either side of Saturday's game. "We told the players that football is not a job, it is your life," says the arbitrarily disliked Town coach by way of explanation for his players' improved performance, "and we wanted them to play for their lives." Almost Shanklyesque, that one. The fledgling GTFC manager displays a useful grasp of metaphor, furthermore, in justifying the inclusion of a less than fit Stacy Coldicott. "We needed to keep the game tight and I wanted my yard dog out there," says Grezza, perhaps inspired by the canine kidnap antics that recently propelled the midfielder into the Redditch media spotlight. "If you come into Stacy's yard then he's going to bite you." I like this!

What else? By now you have probably read the sad news of Bill Carr's death last week, and the altogether cheerier tidings that Mr Furneaux has administered a valedictory slagging-off to the treacherous Michael Boulding, who left the Mariners for Barnsley last week only a week after pledging his immediate future to the club. "Michael was part of the side that underperformed," points out the chairman in the weekend's Sports Telegraph. "No-one has pointed the finger at any one player but everyone has to take responsibility for Paul Groves's going." Quite right too. Town and the Grimbo Telegraph are doing their bit to combat child obesity by offering kids cheap hot dogs at tomorrow night's "child free game" against Bristol City (I know there's no hyphen there, but calling it that could still be misleading), and, er, here are some plates.

"Painstaking research on t'internet has led me to the conclusion that the new manager may almost possibly be one of the following: John Barnes, John Cockerill, Glenn Cockerill, Roy Evans, Steve Cotterill, Ron Atkinson, Lou Macari, Trevor Francis, Ray Mathias, John Ward, Nigel Clough, Paul Wilkinson, Bruce Rioch, Nigel Spackman, Lawrie McMenemy, Roland Nilsson, John Beck, Chris Nicholl, Kevin Wilson, Alan Buckley, Keith Alexander, Alan Smith, Alan Cork, Brian Laws, Nicky Law, Steve Wignall, David Batty, Ray Graydon, John Aldridge, Terry Dolan, Paul Hart, Brian Horton, Andy Ritchie, Bill Dearden, Ivano Bonetti, Graham Rix, Steve Kember, Paul Brush, Kenny Swain, Martin Wilkinson, Carlton Palmer, Graham Rodger, Tony Cottee or Kevin Drinkell," writes Mark Stilton in an email to the Diary. "You heard it here first." Word on the streets is that he will also have two eyes. Which at least rules out Arsene Wenger.