Cod Almighty | Diary

Diary - Thursday 18 March 2004

18 March 2004

"You could have seen that coming a mile off," said thousands of Grimsby fans last night as Swindon stuck two past the Mariners without reply; the Diary, in fact, did see it coming a mile off, and successfully stuck a few quid on a Swindon/West Ham/Oxford treble. To say it was a stroll for the Wiltshire side might be a bit harsh on Town, as chances were at least created for Rowan and Jevons to squander, but Nicky Law will be far from alone in wondering where his side's next away point is going to come from. With the Yard Dog's groin still being felt, the one and only surprise on the night was a return to first-team duty for youthful midfielder Chris Bolder, restored to the starting line-up in preference to Des Hamilton for his first appearance since the last time Town played Swindon, back in September.

Mark Stilton has been the first to email the Diary with his take on the result - he's been the only, in fact - opining: "Nicky Law said he had a few positives to take out of the game last night and I have to agree with him. I was expecting us to get thrashed 7-0, but instead it was only 2-0. Which is like a 5-0 win in a way. But without the three points. And the five goals. And the actually winning bit."

Happier news for admirers of quick strikers. It sounds like a pangram, but it isn't. Law wants to extend the loan of quick but injured striker Isaiah Rankin until the end of the season, telling the Mariners' official website: "His loan is up on the 20th, so if he is anywhere near fit, we need to be extending his loan until the end of the season. Even if he is a week, two weeks away, he will be a vital player for us." It's funny, you know: when sports writers first started quoting from the internet and used phrases like "...he told the club's official website", I used to think it sounded really weird, as if some manager or player was talking to a computer screen, but I don't now. The Bouncer has also been threatening to expel Premiership managers from the club unless they loan him some of their promising youngsters: "I've made a couple of calls on the way down and maybe there could be something tomorrow - but I'm now getting too excited," which either is a w/t typo or means Law could use a few temazepams.

One of our esteemed manager's former charges at Bradford, Luke Cornwall, has done something notable by leaving Valley Parade for Woking. The reason this is considered Diary-worthy is of course that the young London-born striker spent a productive loan spell at Blundell Park in 2001, scoring four of the goals that helped Town stay up that year, in those dim and distant first division days. Cornwall made only two full appearances for Bradford, though, since joining last summer, and has been snapped up by Glenn Cockerill following his release by the, erm, ooh, I can't remember Bradford's nickname. Ne' mind.

So to the Ballad of Long-Ball Nicky, which readers with extraordinarily long memories will recall began yesterday as the Mariners' brave new leader sought to defend his unsubtle tactics but admitted: "Sometimes it isn't pretty, sometimes it isn't nice". Cod Almighty match reporter and part-time bass guitarist Tony Butcher has been quick off the mark to complete Nicky's first verse. "Sometimes it isn't pretty, sometimes it isn't nice/If I tell a joke you've probably heard it before," writes our Tone. "Sorry, that's something else entirely. How about: I like my right-backs gritty, and my aardvarks twice? It makes as much sense as anything else coming out of the bouncer's head." The Syd Barrett influence is clearly coming through. Mark Wilson, meanwhile, is working more in the style of his namesake Brian by writing: "Sometimes it isn't pretty, sometimes it isn't nice/It doesn't matter much, I'll be on my way in a trice." If this seems tinged with cynicism then Mark's second verse is rooted in a more optimistic pragmatism: "Sometimes the ball has to come back to earth covered in ice/But if it keeps us up, it's a very, very small price." I think you might be opening a can of worms there, fella...