Cod Almighty | Diary
Diary - Tuesday 24 August 2004
24 August 2004
"0&²ufÏ?¦Ù?ª?bÎl ????????????3&²ufÏ?¦ Ù?ª?bÎlZ???????0?????????," begins an interview with Graham Rodger on Town's official website. The Mariners' assistant manager continues: "Seh????????éÝé çN?ÃYIsz4o ??????°YÛÁÄ?a ???????ÀX@ì????? ÿë????û??????????? y???y???O??µ?¿?.©Ï?ã?À." Then when you press the back button on your browser, right-click the link instead, save the Windows media file down to your hard disc and open it using your audio player software, he talks about his side's defeat at Rushden last Saturday and their chances in tonight's League Cup tie against Wigan. It sounds like his vocals have been put through a phaser pedal, with a touch of compression, but it does make a bit more sense than before. To be fair, though, I guess I could always splash out for Mariners World, and listen to some demented cockney bawling on about Michael "Reedy", and David Burns interrupting the action from the Town game with news of an important injury in the Everton/Crystal Palace match, then sodding off to Hull for the final ten minutes.
Anyroad, as reported yesterday, Simon 'Would Be Nicknamed Ronnie Had We Not Signed Bull' Ramsden is Town's major doubt for tonight's encounter after sustaining neck dick in the Rushden match, but the good news is that Wigan's frighteningly effective forward line of Nathan Ellington and Jason Roberts is to be taken apart and stored in a cupboard until the weekend. The striking pair are carrying hurty knee and achey ankle respectively, and although Roberts was a bit rubbish whenever he lined up against the Mariners for West Brom, the two of them have had grown second-flight defences screaming like babies so far this season and their absence can provide a boost to the Mariners' hopes of avoiding a tonking tonight. That'll be a hat-trick for Gary Liddell's lad now then.
Hey, get your hands off! I said it first!
Diary readers have been busily tapping up their nominations for Town's true cult heroes, and the first to do so and email them to me is Cod Almighty match reporter and future prime minister of England Mr Tony Butcher. TB follows a suggestion by Mark Stilton that obscure former loanee Dale Banton is the rightful bearer of the cult hero tag - "It's a hair thing," explains the subject line of his email - but also concedes: "It was that or Ashley Fickling." Next to reach my inbox was Al Wilkinson, who writes: "It would have to be Vance Warner, the centre-half with the grace of a an old fat dog trying to light a match and the skill of a duck trying to build a bridge. If it wasn't for him I'd have thought just about every defender we've had since was total rubbish, when in all likelihood they've probably been fair to middling. So thank you Vance for saving me from all those negative karmic waves."
It falls to Pat Bell, then, to move to midfield and nominate the great Jim Dobbin. "I'm sure there are Sunderland fans who to this day will raise a glass to his name, and then there was an article (I'll have the cutting at home) about a group of Blackburn fans who formed a Jim Dobbin appreciation society." If you can scan it in, Pat, then I'm sure the Diary's Newcastle-supporting housemate would love a look.
And that's not all from you reader types. Dan Rand's email begins "Dear Dairy," but gets me back onside by agreeing with me about something. "Like you, at the beginning of the season I was very suspicious of the 3-4-3 formation," writes the assonant Mr Rand. "Given our current injury status, can you comment on the rumour (I am starting here) of an impending switch to 2-5-3 and what impact it will have on the game?" Well, Dan, I don't think it need come to that. If Lennie Lawrence could play Danny Butterfield in the middle of the park and Alan Buckley could occasionally deploy Stacy Coldicott at right-back then what's to stop Graham Hockless filling in as a strapping centre-half? Oh.