Cod Almighty | Diary

Diary - Thursday 7 April 2005

7 April 2005

When it comes to Town news I'm an avid consumer;
if the news isn't there then I'll make do with rumour:
releasing Rob Jones or re-signing Matt Bloomer -
just give me some Town news to read.

Whose attitude Russell Slade is condemning,
or lucrative new terms for big Terry Fleming;
if I don't get some soon then I'll make like a lemming -
just give me some Town news to read.

A takeover bid by Ivano Bonetti,
the kiosk now offering half-time spaghetti;
its absence has made me unpleasantly sweaty -
just give me some Town news to read.

Sex scandals involving John Fenty's pet kitten,
an offer from Chelsea for Town's Martin Gritton;
I don't care if it's false or appallingly written -
just give me some Town news to read.

Make up some gossip concerning Shim Sladey;
if you want, it can feature Giovanni Carchedi,
a bucket of yoghurt and Town's cleaning lady -
just give me some Town news to read.

So Radio Humberside, cure my affliction,
or Telegraph Sport, please address my addiction;
I'll gladly make do with the flimsiest fiction -
just give me some Town news to read.