Cod Almighty | Diary
Diary - Monday 9 May 2005
9 May 2005
Hello again! I don't know about you lot, but I'm having a lovely day today. I've just finished something big and work-related, and I've been out for a walk in the sunshine, and with the Mariners having just recorded their lowest final league position since before I was born, and there being no major international tournament in which England will flatter to deceive, it feels good to be able to forget all about football for three months. Except, that is, for the small matter of having to maintain the Diary during the close season - but this shouldn't be a big deal given that much of the Town team also seemed to have forgotten all about football for large periods of the past nine months.
Before we all begin football hibernation and start filling this space with idle chatter about plastic bag photographers and Coro, though, there is the not small matter of Southend's justifiable pissed-offness following the incursion onto the grass of several dozen cloned pubescent synthetic fibre enthusiasts at the climax of Saturday's game. Town's official website has very sportingly reported the words of both Shrimpers manager Steve Tilson and chairman Ron Martin: "The fans are where they shouldn't be, they stopped the ball going out of play sometimes, and to top it off the ref has blown early as a result," said the former, while Martin has described the invasion as "disgraceful" and plans to report Town to the FA. As those responsible compare their exploits in the playground this lunchtime, let us hope that the hard-up Mariners aren't hit with a fine from the governing body - although a fine might be the only way to convince the club to improve its stewarding. I wonder what's happening with the case of the incredible collapsing temporary seating as well.
Summertime is as synonymous with boring, drawn-out transfer non-stories as it is with overhyped music festivals and smelly topless Englishmen, and even the Mariners are not immune. His Eminence the Most Reverend Emperor Sir Boutros-Boutros Macca has told the Grimsby Telegraph today that he expects his future to be decided one way or t'other by Wednesday, allaying fears that the close season would see a repeat of the "he's off to Hull... now he's staying with Town... now he's off to Hull again" saga of 2003, which GTFC fans will recall rivalled even the Premiership's annual Vieira-to-Real Madrid yawnfest for raw soporific power. If you haven't been keeping up, then basically, well, Town and Macca are negotiating over a new contract. He might sign it, he might not. If he doesn't it will be a shame. Got that? Good.
As my colleague Mister Andrew Holt noted in his guest appearance here on Friday, Town have announced their programme of pre-season friendlies, and the big news is that none of them are against Halifax or Scarborough. What he didn't tell you - on the lamentably weak excuse that they hadn't been announced at the time - were the dates for the games against Scunthorpe, Doncaster and Lincoln. They have now. The might of promoted Scunny will present the first test for Mr Russell Slade's new improved Mariners side (now with added spine), visiting Blunder Park - as some of their wittier supporters have rechristened it - on Thursday 14 July; while Russ takes Lincolnshire's new underdogs to Belle Vue on Wednesday 27 July and Sincil Bank on Sunday 31 July. It's more local than a localised shower while you're reading your local paper over a pint at your local.
Lastly today but by no means leastly today, the Diary would like to draw your attention to another rather spiffy initiative from Town's supporters' trust - admittedly one to which your attention has already been drawn by Rachel Branson in her latest KTMA update thingummy, but such is its profound spiffiness that I figured it deserved a supersized attention with extra attention to go. What it is, right, is a web page where you can order stuff from lots of big-name retailers at the normal price and a proportion of the cash goes to help the trust buy shares and keep the Mariners afloat, like. The phrase 'win-win situation' leaps jauntily to mind at this point, unless of course you buy the new Athlete album. Give it a go, why don't you.