Cod Almighty | Diary

Diary - Wednesday 8 June 2005

8 June 2005

At last Town have more than one midfielder - and contrary to earlier reports, the man who has just been brought in to play football in midfield has a name. It is Terry Barwick. He is 22 years old and has signed a two-year contract. For Diary readers whose cup is half empty, the club's official website describes him as "combative with a good engine", which is of course far more important in a Grimsby midfielder these days than the ability to pass a ball. Furthermore, he played once for Scunthorpe last season, when they achieved automatic promotion, and 41 times the season before last, when they came within a gnat's chuff of relegation to the Conference. If, on the other hand, you prefer to perceive your drinking vessel as within 50 per cent of happy repletion then you might console yourself with the knowledge that the Mariners have signed a player from a higher division, and if he's related to that bloke from the FA then maybe he can pull in a few favours.

Justin Whittle, meanwhile, has presumably returned to these humble shores from whichever exotic destination found him holidaying, as Town's reliable captain has also signed a new contract. The best news of all today, however, is that Mariners legend Sir Glen Downey has done likewise! Admittedly, HRH His Holiness the Rt Hon Sir Glen played only a quarter of an hour of first team football throughout the 2004-05 campaign, but those who made the journey to Kidderminster on 30 April will testify, to a man, that so glorious and majestic were those fifteen minutes that the decision to extend his terms at Blundell Park can only have been a formality, and Russell Slade is sure to have beaten off fierce competition from rival clubs to retain the services of His Magnificence the Very Rev Sir Glen MBE. Bravo!

A frightened, cursory examination of the murky depths of the Diary's inbox, then, and Phil Shorter has emailed on a variety of subjects. "Yes, the Diary is right," he announces uncontroversially, "that 1998 DVD was definitely on sale in the club shop before the end of last season." Maybe this is the director's cut, then, and in this version Kevin Donovan doesn't explain to Alan Buckley why he saved his life. "I know we are often hearing about Challinor (boo, hiss)," adds Phil, "but what happened to the Charlton/Swedish guy who Challinor tried to separate from his leg?" The answer is that Martin Pringle eventually had to retire from football. His injury and the end of his playing career brought him tremendous sympathy from fans and well-wishers throughout the game of football. Then he blew it all by becoming an agent.

Finally today, season ticket sales seem to be exceeding all expectations. But they say that every year, don't they? Maybe they should think about raising their expectations a bit.