Cod Almighty | Diary

Diary - Wednesday 6 July 2005

6 July 2005

After prolonged rioting by protesters in the run-up to the main occasion, the authorities have baton-charged those responsible and restored military order... and Russell Slade has told the press that if his players kick up any more fuss about their pre-season training regime then next time he'll get the plastic bullets out. HONK! The Diary has just been watching footage from Town's crackpot army camp thing: as with most Mariners World video the speech is all mumbly and you can't really hear a bloody word of it, but the visuals are clear enough, and fans who log on are able to watch the players prepare for the extreme physical demands of fourth division football with a tough session of, er, walking along for a bit and then stopping and standing still. Mind you, some of them seem to be struggling even with that, and a short back and sides is sure to be administered if Michael Reddy doesn't buck his ideas up soon.

Speaking of the Graignamanagh-born frontman, his presumably sweat-soaked 2004-05 match shirt is the object made available in the Mariners' latest QXL auction. These cash-clawing exercises have become so commonplace that the Diary long since ceased to report every single one. I'm only mentioning this one because there's chuff all else to tell you.

Frequent Diary emailer John Pakey has come up with a useful way for us to pad out these empty summer days. "Your suggestion to get more sleep has been taken on board," says John, whose obscenely long working hours have recently loosened his grip on the English football transfer market. "As a result I've decided to give up shaving for a week to get more time in bed, which leads me to wonder; who out of all the Grimsby Town heroes in the past has produced the best facial hair growth? And does football need more facial hair?" Worthy questions indeed, JP, and ones that will doubtless generate much debate; diary@codalmighty.com is the address to which your responses, readers, should be directed. Many thanks. I'm off to buy a house in east London, quick.