Cod Almighty | Diary

Diary - Friday 1 July 2005

1 July 2005

Listen. Can you hear a scraping noise? Yes you can! It's Bottom-of-the-Barrel Diary here again, coming-at-yer live from the Lincolnshire village of Tetney. Nearly time for this year's Burning of the Straw King! I'm glad I hid when the village elders came round!

So, Town news, that's what you're after. News of the Town eh? Well Blackburn tickets are on sale. Coo. Slightly more excitingly, two foreign triallist Johnnies will be accompanying the squad to the Boot Camp next week. Personally I'd rather we were going to a Pass Camp but there you go. One of them is French, et il s'appelle Makhtar N'Diaye, and the other is a mysterious shadowy figure who prefers to remain anonymous. Or perhaps the OS just doesn't know his name. Apart from that there is no news.

I've been keeping my ear to the ground and all I've heard is the peaceful drone of summer insects, and some rabbits playing cards. So all that remains to me to do is mention this year's last-ever Tetney Scarecrow Festival, to be held in two weeks time, in which slightly sinister, strange-haired figures stand motionless being gawped at by thousands of people. Next year it will be replaced by a Jasoncrowe festival, which will be entirely different. Take care, Townies!