Cod Almighty | Diary

Diary - Monday 22 August 2005

22 August 2005

If you're looking for reassurance in the wake of Saturday's deeply disappointing home defeat by Darlington, then look towards Russell Slade. The Town boss may not always be quick to acknowledge the shortcomings of his side's performances, but this time he's not trying to fool anyone - least of all his own players, who, according to the Grimsby Telegraph, were locked into the dressing room to watch their 90-minute warm-up exercise in its entirety. The United Nations has expressed concern that the manager's actions are in breach of article 5 of the Universal Declaration of Human Rights, which states: "No-one shall be subjected to torture or to cruel, inhuman or degrading treatment or punishment" - but club officials are believed to have pointed out that 11 more victims hardly made a difference given what the other 4,000 had just been through.

Our old mate Paolo di Moranio has emailed the Diary with a request for help. "I'm intending to take two non-Town-supporting mates to the Derby match next week and would like to ensure they have sufficient Grimsby knowledge to feel part of the away support. Is there anywhere on the site I can find some key facts to enhance the lads' knowledge of the town, the club and what it means to be from GY?" Well, Paul - sorry, Paolo - our history section should give a thorough grounding in the 127 years of misery GTFC have inflicted on their supporters; then there are CA's directory of famous Grimsby peeps, our world-famous Concise Grimmo Dictionary, and the invaluable guide to the essentials of local life that is Things You Only Know If You're From Grimsby. By the time they've got through that lot, they should be sitting at Pride Park grumbling and booing to the extent that any innocent passer-by would believe they'd lived their whole lives on Weelsby Street.

And lastly in today's Diary, Dave the Engineer has emailed on the subject of Saturday's man of the match Thomas Pinault. "Have I missed an article or not?" enquires Dave. "Does anyone know the whereabouts of the shiny-legged one? Dizzy Nic, the lovestruck daughter of Sibbo, was enquiring where to find the mercurial Frenchman." Well, I'm afraid I must confess that I have not clapped eyes upon Professor Pinault since 4:44pm on 7 May 2005. Any readers who have followed the great man's movements more closely than I are urged to email details of their Pinault sightings to diary@codalmighty.com. Everton released Alessandro Pistone and then brought him back when they realised they wouldn't be able to sign anyone better, so you never know.