Cod Almighty | Diary

Diary - Monday 21 August 2006

21 August 2006

So little to say, so much time to say it in. This is Deviant Diary, this is what I do.

It's Monday and I've got Friday on my mind. The mystery of the Disappearing Oirishman deepens, with a man in big hat being called in by the local constabulary to help search for the body. Gram Roget is perplexed and spent a long time choosing his synonyms before winking at John Tondeur's microphone in the after-match press conference. It's all getting as tiresome as the magic roundabout of Pouton's return. It's always next week, isn't it. Honest John says the cheque is in the post.

As Big Keef Alexander was spotted walking up Blundell Avenue on Friday, that must mean he's about to launch a daring raid upon our sack store. How could we cope without Terry Barwick. We do still employ him, don't we?

We've been talking yawnsome rumours, and not big-selling mid-seventies AOR rock. Cod Almighty's taste and accuracy filter has been working at 110 per cent capacity, but these summer rainstorms have caused more wheezing and grinding than Town's midfield. Pfg... grzy...Vic Mackie... Tskimboid... Woo-woobung... Chris... Hargreaves... doh! The iron-clad walls of Cod Almighty had kept this in solitary confinement since that day in May. We did it for your own good, for your psychological well-being. We care for you, we really do. Someone will be suggesting Tommy Widdrington next, presumably in a vat of boiling acid, although the boiling is optional and costs just £5 extra. All in a good cause, you know; all proceeds to keep this site going. Mr Normal Diary would love to hear your other ex-Town player/choice of Shakespearean death combinations at the usual address.

What shall we call McIntosh? "Tosh" seems a bit rude, and woefully inappropriate given his performance of Friday night.

Today I might be mad, but tomorrow I'll be glad, I've got the League Cup on my mind. The club expect some people to turn up and pay. Good luck to them. Season ticket holders have until five o'clock to look outside their kitchen window to see if it looks a bit windy and to remember that there's a game going on.

Oh, and Gary Cohen "could" be back in training in September. Yeah, whatever. Can we go back to making up conspiracies?

Breaking news... breaking news... breaking eggs... breaking legs... breaking bread

A helicopter from RAF Leaconfield has found him wandering in a field near Ashby-cum-Fenty! Luton's Michael Reddy has been troubled since the game against Rotherham in early March - during his secret unsuccessful loan to Bristol City, I assume.