Cod Almighty | Diary

Diary - Monday 3 March 2008

3 March 2008

'The right sort of headache' is one of those phrases you only ever hear in relation to association football. This is a shame, as it could be usefully applied in the wider world - signifying, perhaps, a temporary ailment that releases the sufferer from their responsibility to take part in some undesirable activity, such as work, domestic drudgery or parenting duties. It might equally denote a choice needing to be made where each option is equally attractive, such as whether to go to the pub, watch That Mitchell & Webb Look on the telly, or arse about on the internet doing nothing very much for an hour or two. It is the latter that closely approximates the phrase's use in football contexts, as is evidenced by Lord Alan Buckley's use of the phrase this morning. The Town boss is faced with a selection quandary going in to tomorrow evening's Dulux Cup clash with Morecambe - but after resting several players at the weekend only to see their replacements thrash the Shrimps four-nil on their own patch, it's a selection quandary of the entirely fluffy variety rather than the spiky death kind.

Naturally, many of the plaudits for Saturday's walkover are being laid at the shiny boots of Straight Peter Bore, whose rapid two-goal contribution in the first half set Town's juggernaut in motion. Unfortunately the tremendous performance of the practising heterosexual winger/forward has not been match by the club's superb new official website as it quotes the victorious manager. "He's got some much talent," are among the words attributed to Lord Buckley. "I'm fed up of speaking to Peter. He's got some much ability." Some much more than the staff on the SNOS, it would appear.

While he may be among the more enigmatic recent graduates of the Mariners' youth system, SPB is not this season's most successful (or at least not yet). This accolade would surely be contested by the level-headed likes of Danny North and Ryan Bennett, and the latter's swift development has been recognised by an award thing with a risibly convoluted corporate sponsor name. It basically means he's the best young player in the fourth division - which we all knew already, but it's always nice to see GTFC's young talent get the public acclaim they deserve. Or it will be until the summer, at any rate, when Bennett moves to Leeds for £12.95 and a packet of pork scratchings.