Cod Almighty | Diary

SIGNING ALERT

10 January 2014

Mardy Diary writes: Yeah, sure we'd do a signing alert. Although history has shown that when signings are imminent they are usually completed about five minutes after the diary has been published. So... nope, nothing.

Another youther has gone out, this time Caine Winfarrah, who's doing a month's "work experience" at Gainsborough Trinity (one of several #gtfc hashtag imposters on Twitter). I hope he has a better time than I did in my two weeks at B&Q when I was 15 – although making up B&Q shelf labels for 'Quality Pinewood Dildos' was a high point.

It's a good move for the youngster who's had a few minutes' experience of first-team action, but I'm a little bit disappointed that the manager of Gainsborough is just boring old Steve Housham. It's no Rene Funkaholic, is it (or whatever the Scarborough boss was called)?

However, Maidenhead United – Town's opponents in the FA Trophy this weekend, in case you've forgotten – are managed by the brilliantly named Johnson 'Drax' Hippolyte. What a name. And fuck knows what the 'Drax' bit means, but I like it and I'm going to assume it's short for 'Dracula'.

I think perhaps Paul Hurst could lighten up his name a bit – and maybe his mood (although he definitely smiled during that Huddersfield match). He just needs an outlandish fake middle name, or one of those English wrestler names: Paul 'The Burst' Hurst? Paul 'Hirsute' Hurst? No? Oh well. Perhaps we're best sticking with a more classic Grimsby nickname: Paul 'Hursto' Hurst.

Back in our League days (remember?) there were a handful of great web-based fanzines around who we'd always pay a visit to: Blind, Desperate and Stupid; Greens on Screen; One Vale Fan; ImpsTalk; Ormondroyd's Fulham reports and HTFC World with their fantastically funny match reports.

A couple of these sites are sadly no more, but most of them, including HTFC World, are still going strong. And thank buggery for that because their Town v Town FA Cup match report is a thing of beauty. Go and have a look. Go on!