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Cod Almighty | Diary

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28 December 2015

Wicklow Diary writes: The diary rotation has been shuffled this week for no other reason than to add to that “what bloody day is it?” feeling. Guiseley postponement aside, how’s your Christmas been? We had a genuine first world crisis when Santa replaced the PlayStation 2 with an Xbox. Sure, the graphics are great but what about Town? Our PS2 FIFA 13 custom GTFC team (only missing McKeown, Pearson and Bogle) has been virtually righting various wrongs. Now it seems we’re stuck with a FIFA 16 side consisting of just Conor Townsend. He’s good but he’s not that good. Looks like the PS2 won’t be going on eBay just yet.

As we all know, you have to want to go to Grimsby. The location isn’t the problem, it’s the infrastructure. A rail network that has made millionaires of several Barnetby-le-Wold replacement bus drivers and an airport that only serves the Aberdeen branch of the GTFC Supporters Club means a rear-numbing drive is most visitors’ transport of 'choice'.

Perversely, these logistical challenges have in some ways made it easier to be an exiled Town fan. Over the years, for my own sanity and that of my family, I have learned – eventually – not to base my enjoyment of the trip solely on the result. A defeat can almost be offset by the pleasure in catching up with friends, the fish supper and spending a week’s wages in the club shop. Obviously it’s harder to take this lofty view of events if you go every week and have seen three 0-1 defeats in a month.

Rocking up to BP for a local derby is another matter. We all know it’s just another three points at stake this afternoon but the atmosphere all around the town says otherwise. The TV cameras are here again, twelve hundred Imps have caught Grimsbyitis to swell the gate to eight thousand and even PH is talking it up. I’ve tried it but the bigger picture approach doesn’t work on derby games. Anything but a victory today will hurt.

Unfortunately, like all local rivalries, it can spill over into some pretty rank and embarassing lowest common denominator stuff. However if you can ignore the inbreeding, incest and other less pleasant name-calling exchanged by people who live just down the road from one another, these games are undoubtedly highlights of the fixture list. For a start, seeing the Osmond full is a reminder of happier times back in the league when such a sight and atmosphere was common.

The game is obviously more important than bragging rights. The Guiseley postponement and Cheltenham’s win means an ugly gap has opened up and we’ve had to rev up the "win our games in hand and beat them away" calculations. Just like we’ve been unable to get beyond seven goals for Retro, March 1990’s seven game streak is the upper limit for wins in my lifetime. Our modest five game win run could do with becoming as brazen and brash as it likes and smashing that.

We’ll be rested but the Imps huffed and puffed to a 1-0 defeat against Halifax at Sincil Bank on Saturday. Another good result for the Shaymen – I’ve been hoping they can turn it around since their official twitter account tweeted this nugget during their Blundell Park thrashing:

For us only JP is definitely out. Monkers is a doubt with a sore Achilles but is expected to be ok. For them, all eyes will be on 15-goal Christmas panto villain Matt Rhead, who went full Brodie during the game in August. It was disappointing to see a player of Josh Gowling’s experience succumb to Rhead’s shenanigans then. It will be almost unforgiveable if there is similar naivety in any black and white shirt today.

Their other danger man is Nathan Blissett. Dangerous just to us it would seem - his only goal in about seventeen years came at BP for Tranmere in October. I am taking some of the blame for that by suggesting he was a bit useless in the diary back then. He can be used for Telly Bingo if you are watching on BT Sport today. Along with the customary “just twelve years since BP was a Championship venue” line, expect Blissett to be mentioned for his Tranmere goal and for playing at Wembley in the play-off final.

In contrast to our five wins, the Imps are winless in their last five league games. Bear in mind though that last season they hadn’t won away for months and stuffed us. For the record, today is our 100th regular season league meeting; that’s including non-League as league if you know what I mean. We hold a healthy W-D-L advantage at 41-30-28 and the home record is 23-16-10.

Something else to watch for today was identified by Rob on The Fishy. If we win 1-0 it will be the first time in our history that we have won four league matches in a row by that score line.

From previous evidence, we expect Lincoln will push and pull, niggle and time waste. Adrian Holmes is the ref and Tony’s Match Stats suggest that the naughty Imps might be in luck.

Holmes was “mightily indulgent of Torquay’s time-wasting and cynical spoiling from the off” in his last game here in August. Ominously he was also criticised for not sending Brodie off for Southport in February 2014. His complete BP W-D-L record stands at 2-3-2 with a thoroughly average average Tony B rating of 5.498.

That’s it for this morning, let’s go wallop them. UTM.