Cod Almighty | Diary

Love is like a butterfly

5 December 2016

Miss Guest Diary writes: It's bad enough having to come here and write something when I haven't been to Saturday's game, but it's doubly hard when there hasn't even been a game. My respect for the midweek diarists, who face that situation all the time, has grown enormously.

I could write about the angst of some Town fans on social media last week: "Oh no, (insert name of club here) is going to take Omar away!" and "Boo hoo, I can't get a Donny ticket because they've been taken by glory-seeking groundhoppers!" But that sort of thing is vastly more entertaining when witnessed first hand, so I won't bother.

It would have been nice to see some footage from Town's in-house game last Friday. Instead I braved the annoying ads on the Grimsby Telegraph site to learn that the goalkeepers shouted a lot, there was a battle in midfield between the attack-minded Summerfield and Berrett and the defence-minded Disley and Comley, and that Josh Venney played well and scored.

At the weekend, I was reduced to getting my footballing fix – and diary content – from watching the TV. I started with Friday's FA Cup game on the BBC. Beforehand I was rooting for Oxford: there have been too many miserable occasions on the terrace at Moss Rose for me to want Macclesfield to win. But then I spotted Jacky Macky – as Jack Mackreth is known in this household – warming up in a Macclesfield shirt.

I always liked him when he played for Town and felt he could have been better for us if only he'd been given a consistent run in the team. He was certainly the man of the match in Friday's game and might even have scored a winner when his late shot hit the post. Well done, Jacky Macky!

Then it was on to the Saturday teatime game on BT Sport: West Ham v Arsenal. We all know that when watching a game as a neutral it is usually not about who you want to win but who you'd more like to see lose. West Ham certainly fit that bill for me, and they obliged in style. Arsenal wasted loads of chances before they did score, but after that it was the Alexis Sanchez show and great entertainment too.

That match also gave me the opportunity to indulge in a bit of Where's Wal(ly)cott by exclaiming: "Oh, I didn't even realise he was on the pitch" when Theo Walcott was substituted.

Rounding off a great day of vicarious footballing pleasure was Match of the Day, which had everything you could ask for when your team is not involved: goals, red cards, punch-ups and a goalkeeping howler. You have to say Fraser Forster's gift of a goal to Crystal Palace made McKeown's mistake the other week against Carlisle pale into insignificance.

And the cherry on the top of Saturday's football cake was hearing that Cheltenham – our dislikeable promotion rivals from last season who are currently languishing in the relegation zone – lost to non-League Sutton United.

For my Town fix at the weekend, I listened to the CodPod. If you haven't caught up with it yet, it's Lloyd Griffith and chums rambling about recent Town events. The one a few weeks ago which had Wayne Burnett as a guest was excellent (I might be a little biased there), but this week's was a bit laddish for my taste. Too much toilet talk, literally.

And finally, I've got a sneaky feeling that I'm falling in love: I can feel those butterflies. That's not me, I hasten to add, but a direct quote from Marcus Bignot's interview last week on Mariners Player. Oh Marcus, you big tease.