Cod Almighty | Diary

We'll always have Graham Rodger

6 July 2017

Middle-Aged Diary has to be honest with you. On Tuesday afternoon the denizens of Cod Almighty Towers were at a low ebb. We'd been set off by the tale of a young lad who, despite already playing regular first-team football at Exeter, had accepted the Hobson's choice of a place in the gilded cage of Chelsea's football academy.

"UK prison population is biggest in Western Europe," says the headline. England must also be right at the top for incarcerating its promising young footballers in a system that means they play no competitive football as well. It may be a myth, but it's said that once upon a time, English clubs would avoid training with the ball in midweek so their players would be hungry for it on a Saturday. Nowadays, Premier League clubs just make sure they kick a ball about where no-one will see them, unless they can make a packet out of it.

Remembering the tale of how they took legal action, against a team set up by Spurs fans in 1951, to protect their image rights, our ire turned to Tottenham Hotspur. In the new White Hart Lane, you'd be able to join 'the Tunnel Club'. For a £30,000 joining fee (for two) plus a £400 per match fee you could eat in a restaurant built around the players' tunnel with one-way glass allowing "lounge guests to see the inner sanctum with a behind-the-scenes view".

Now I know what you are thinking: "What kind of wankers would want to join the Tunnel Club?"

Obligingly, the artist's impressions show us the answer.

 

 

If you are young, white, and like strutting around in elaborately casual but exclusively expensive clothes, Tottenham's Tunnel Club is just the place for you.

At the point that Wicklow Diary brought that to our attention on Tuesday, if my mood was anything to go by, there was a fair chance Cod Almighty would be relaunching next season as a fanzine for Sheffield FC, or Trafford, or just buying a decent pair of boots and spending your Saturdays up on the moors. The privatisation of the people's game was complete.

But then there was this.

 

 

And with that, faith is restored. Congratulations, and thanks, to the Grimsby Town Sports and Education Trust and the Equality Practice for reminding me what is important. Grimsby Town, by the skin of its teeth, remains a football club, an association of people with an interest and a community in common.

Let's have no illusions. There are no doubt one or two people in or near the Grimsby boardroom who think the Tunnel Club sounds just the thing for Peaks Parkway. But at least the suspicion that the mural was only allowed because they have been neglecting Blundell Park for years is allayed by the SNOS's evident pride in this initiative. The game is sick, but it is not yet dead.

Other bits of Blundell Park do not meet with approval...

I was interested in Tuesday's diary highlighting the lack of a second full stop on the Town crest, which is indeed a minor tragedy. However, I'm surprised that this should cause such a kerfuffle, given the Osmond Stand invitation which has read for some years now as "Visitor's Seating".

I have always been interested in which particular visitor this is. Does he/she have some special arrangement with the club? And of course, has no fucker noticed for the last five years?

Yours in moderately anal mode,
Phil Ball

To be fair, the notice may have been erected when there was every chance that just one visitor would turn up for an FA Trophy game.

While we are emptying out our mailbag, John has taken issue with Kevin Donovan's selection on the right wing of the Wembley XI: "Colbeck's non-stop running, cross for the goal, and being behind every positive thing that happened on the pitch should take the spot. You could see how out on his feet he was by 90 mins constantly chasing Wrexham's winger back, but he never stopped and put in countless challenges in his own half before then charging up the pitch ball at feet."

Watch this space, John; Colbeck may yet get a place.

On Tuesday against Cleethorpes, Russell Slade resolved his left-back problem by giving a run-out in each half in the position to Josh Venney and Max Wright, currently training with Town in the hope of being offered new contracts. It remains to be seen what he does for tonight's game against Grimsby Borough.

The left-back slot in the Wembley XI is even harder to fill. Our options include Tony Gallimore, who hardly stood out in either of our 1998 appearances; Dave Smith, who moved back to full-back against Bournemouth and played his part in stretching their defence; Tom Newey, who played well as the left-most of three central defenders in 2008 but who suffers the twin disadvantages of having played against Bastard Franchise Scum and of being Tom Newey; and Aswad Thomas, who played with no particular distinction against Wrexham. I'm inclined to award the place to Gregor Robertson, a quietly calming influence against Forest Green. What do you think?

There are people you would need a heart of stone not to wish all the best. Graham Rodger first came to Grimsby as a central defender in 1992 and has since held just about every role at the club, from manager to setting the pigeons on their way with the latest scores. To say he has not had the recognition he deserves would be an understatement, but it was Rodger who brought the phrase 'yard dog' – applying it to the also under-appreciated Stacy Coldicott – into the Grimsby vernacular. With his appointment as chief scout, it is still possible we will sign the odd duff player, or get caught out by an opponent's unexpected tactics. But we can be sure it will not be through any lack of application on Rodger's part.

Good luck to him, and to us.