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Cod Almighty | Postbag

Postbag: reading letters since 1908

6 January 2005

I know, I know. "Look," I told them, "If I haven't done a letters page before December, I'll strip naked and run across the pitch at Blundell Park." Well, the rest, as they say, is history. So here it is: a very late letters page. I did it as soon as they released me from the cells.Email postbag@codalmighty.com with letters and moans and praise and all the usual stuff

Tactics tinker

Mr Wilson's piece regarding GTFC's season so far has hit many nails on the head.

One point I think should be included is Slade's continual tweaking of his tactics for away games. On occasion, like at Chester, this has been down to available personnel, but usually it is more down to the manager's own choice. Bizarrely, the players seem to struggle coping with a more traditional 4-4-2 or 4-5-1 (or 4-4-1-1 as the fickle would rather it be known) than Slade's preferred 3-4-3. Prior to this season, Town teams have struggled to cope when forced into using a back three. Remember Lennie Lawrence's declaring "we will play a back three"?

Another point, although one I suspect there isn't much credence to, is that Town are deliberately playing crap away from home so Town fans realise it is a futile gesture and stop going to away games, therefore saving their money which they can then spend by going to more home games and in the club shop. Carrying this through, I wonder if Slade is purposefully luring oppenents into a false sense of security. By being placed lower in the league, more teams will think Town aren't any good and will approach games accordingly, thinking an easy win is on the cards. And then they roll up at Blundell Park and discover the truth... Town are an easy win.

from Tony Rogers

Chinese chow

Despite bringing all these players in and vowing that they will live in the area, has Russell Slade actually got a team that really gives a toss about the club, the people, the area?

They're just more transient employees, who were made to move to the area. In effect all Russ has done is save them from commuting to Grimmo from somewhere more glamorous like, say, Sheffield. This means, going by players' habits revealed in the matchday programme, more time for Playstation. And less of their low wages spent on fuel.

Would any of the players left from previous managerial regimes be able to pass on what it is like to live in the area? Macca and Stace aside, I can't think of one.

And, come to think of it, what's Slade doing picking up a Chinese meal from a takeaway in Mablethorpe? I take it he didn't drive all the way down to Mabo from Grimmo as he'd heard there's a shit-hot Chinese down there. Hardly Grimsby is it?

from Andy Atkins

Artful articulation

Your article about Town's current position sums up exactly how I and the few Town fans I know feel. If only the Grimsby Telegraph had the sense to echo how fans feel in a similar fashion. Excellent work - and keep it up.

from Ian Poulter

Czechs chopped

Just come across this site. Quality. Love the pieces on each club. Especially as you sort of say something nice about mine - Ciderspace.

Of course Yeovil didn't beat Czechoslovakia 8-3 in 1933. We were playing a club from there called Sport Club Nachod. They appear to no longer exist. Which isn't surprising given the humiliation of defeat by a crappy club like ours. Instantly disbanded I'd guess. Prefer the idea it was Czechoslovakia though!

As you might surmise, our knowledge of Grimsby is substantially less than zero. Any suggestions from the cod's mouth as to good pubs for our away guide to Grimsby would be welcome. Real ale isn't important - just utterly essential! Regards.

from Hugh

Letters Ed responds: If it's ale you're after Hugh, then the best port of call for you would be Willy's on the seafront. It's about 20 minutes' walk from the ground, but the beer is worth it. And you can pick up some chips on the way

Slade sorted

Cod Almighty is so good it's becoming addictive! Has it won any awards yet? Love the very funny daily (almost) diary, and what can we say about the very true 'SORT IT SLADE' logon page. As Rachel Stevens might say, give us More More More!

One, or two things I will suggest is updating them 'Sort it Slade' things more often (daily possibly). Maybe getting an interview with Russ Slade like you did at the Halifax game would be nice.

from Danny

Letters Ed responds: Thanks Danny. As it happens, we did get a mention in When Saturday Comes recently, who thought CA was one of the top five club sites on the internet. Which was nice

Macca mecca

Sir John McDermott gives me the horn.

from Dave Waters

Venn verified

In Mr Green's article about Chapman's Pond and its supposed bottomlessness he uses a Venn diagram to show the subsets of Chapman's Ponds Knowledge. I would like to point out that I am from Beverley and Hull and Leeds, although I went to uni in Bristol, and consequently so I clearly sit in to the white area on all counts. But I've now heard of Chapman's Pond so I sit in yellow section. But I can't be in the yellow bit because I'm not from Grimsby (as previously shown) and so I'm not in the pink section. I've never even been to the Auditorium.

Please please please correct the diagram so that I know where I sit. I feel empty and vacant and cannot sleep at night being so unsure of my whereabouts.

from Euan Mann

Letters Ed responds: It's simple Euan. As a former resident of Hull you sit at the bottom of Chapman's Pond

Die dilemma

I have recently acquired a 'Grimsby Town Supporters Club' casting die for making badges and cannot find its logo anywhere. It is a chap with a beard smoking a pipe (looks like a fisherman to me). I have bought this for my father who has been a lifelong fan of Town, and would be really grateful if you had seen anything like it and knew anything about it.

from Matt Mackenzie

Letters Ed responds: That sounds brilliant. Can anyone help Matt out?

Crap 'keeper

Not liking to criticise individual players to further undermine their fragile confidence, but CA must do something about that shallow excuse for a keeper before Town get a real hiding. Town have nearly always had good shot stoppers who could command the penalty area, but in recent years and more especially recent months have one who can't even command his six yard box looking terrified every time a corner is taken sticking up his arms like a school kid wanting to go to the bog flapping his hands at long shots that magnetically (or summut) divert themselves round his body mass in a word crap bah humbug burble burble burble burble...

from Phil Shorter

Letters Ed responds: He's improved quite a bit since you sent this, don't you think? Or are you still convinced he's a waste of space?

Gaudy glory

Am I the only one sick of seeing references to glory-hunting types in the Grimsby Telegraph? It's people like these who contribute to the lack of progress at clubs like GTFC.

from Roger Forman

Tower teaser

Re: Dock Tower. Dunno about the Italian influence - but can anyone tell me where they get the pretty Christmas lights from?

from Daz G

Covert coveting

Love the Town Commandments, although I don't suppose we have to worry about coveting our neighbour's ass as this would mean something to do with Mr Laws. Nothing to do with his ass I hope.

from Al Wilkinson

Bill's bungalow?

I live on Campden Crescent in Cleethorpes, I've heard from a few people that Bill Shankly lived on this street. Can you tell me if he did and if so what number?

from Curt

Top tunes

In my current job I find myself going to a lot of different football grounds in the League One stratosphere and as a consequence suffering different offerings for what the teams run out to. There are the usual, 'The boys are back in town', 'right here, right now' and other predictable tunes doing the rounds and it is oftern the case now that I don't notice them. The one that has stuck in my mind the most, though, is Chesterfield. The chirpy Spireites hold no pretension that their club is in a superstadium which is their 'field of dreams'or and other kind of silly marketing nonsense. As they come out of the tunnel the Derbyshire boys do so to the fantastic Tony Christie track 'Is this the way to Amarillo?'. It is fun and pretty unique.

Now it's the individual edge of Pisces' very own 'Up the Mariners' that in my mind makes it a perfect track for the lads to step out to. I feel it's time to hijack the PA at Blundell Park and get the crowd going with that tune beacuse it's Grimsby Town that rules OK! Up the mariners, up the mariners...

from John Pakey

Letters Ed responds: You'll be glad to hear then that they have been playing it at a lot of matches - although it's often quite inaudible - but I think that's probably the fault of our 100-year-old PA system.

Withering whistlers

Wow! A reference to 'Whistling Jack Smith' in a report on a fourth division football match (Tony B.- Town v Cambridge). How that evoked the smell of Juicy Fruit, and the memories of a programme for six old pence and a go at 'Beat the Clock' with our timekeeper Jack Swain.

Many readers might not know that 'Whistling' had a 1967 hit with 'I was Kaiser (spelling x 50 Tony - there is no z in Kaiser) Bill's Batman'. However, Tony could have used 'Whistling' to better effect, given the quality of the game we watched and given that the B-side was titled 'The British grin and bear'. I hope this is helpful.

from Gill the record collector