The Diary

Cod Almighty | Diary

What's going on?

27 March 2024

Hello, 'tis your emergency Deviant Diarist, leaping into action as your normal Wednesday wordsmith has succumbed to last minute life events, aka work.

What's going on? Yeah, what's going on, I'll tell you, what's going on. There's too many of you crying, there's far too many of you sighing. You know we've got to find a way to bring some lovin' here today. And that's just about the bins. Down in the barren boondocks of North East Lincolnshire there's gunshots between the roadworks and rubbish fires. Typical, even our fires are bloody rubbish, Town.

That's right, there's nothing going on. With many a travelling Mariner desperately searching the food hygiene ratings on the Barrow Borough Council website, it's too early for the pre-match Mariner mutterings, where merely one mention of Danny Rose has Cagey Dave looking sideways and indulging in passive obfuscation. You and me, we're left here just staring at the sky, rather than SKY, reflecting on the latest meanderings of the National Flag Defilers XI. Lewis Dunk. He's the premiership Luke Waterfall isn't he, always teetering on the edge of calamity, relying on the awesome power of his manly stubble to get him through the night. And Chilwell's just Ringo with a more expensive haircut.

We could update Aimé Jacquet's Filofax, but we here at Cod Almighty Towers (Ivory) spent last night working on our mega-interview with a retiring locally sourced legend. Whoever could it be? We know what you want, and stand by for the astounding miss'n'tell revelations of 40 years of hurt, coming to your screen very soon, including the fullish story of how a Zoom meeting went boom and we were all over the moon as a Fridge Magnate came unstuck.

Tickled and teased enough for one day?