Cod Almighty | Diary

Diary - Monday 13 December 2004

13 December 2004

Mindful of the urgent medical need for me to consume less silly juice, the Diary stayed at home last night, cracked open a four-pack of TV, and watched Bring It On, a film that is admirable not only for its unnecessarily numerous scenes of Kirsten Dunst and Eliza Dushku flouncing around in short skirts but also for its heartwarmingly un-American suggestion that finishing second, while not as good as finishing first, is still quite good really. Today the Diary wonders whether Russell Slade had this likeable tale of Californian cheerleading in mind when giving his initial reactions to Town's 2-1 defeat at Yeovil at the weekend, as the eternally optimistic Town boss seemed quite pleased with the world on Saturday night. Notwithstanding the Mariners' recent slight improvement in form, one is compelled to ask where it all might end, and whether Slade would chucklingly describe relegation to the Conference as "a bit unfortunate, really".

Sort It's equanimity in the face of another three points lost has found its way into the wider media, where Sporting Life's headline Slade philosophical in defeat sadly does not prefigure a series of quotes from the Town boss along the lines of: "At the end of the day, Man's position in the Universe can only be understood as a construct mediated through the senses and intellect and reintepreted via an essentially adaptable framework of morality and social relations, really, Burnsy."

Meanwhile, the redoubtable Teamtalk may be cashing in on the fact that nobody actually reads it by placing a hideous series of text-obscuring fizzy drink adverts all over its pages, but the site proves it can still get the laughs by headlining its copy of the story Slade philoshopical in defeat. Remember, readers - there are only ten philoshopping days left until Christmas. I spend, therefore I am.

Enough with that already. A new day is dawning - but nothing much changes, as the teamsheet for today's reserves game demonstrates. Town's Finnish trialist - I bet you don't know where this is going, do you? - Town's Finnish trialist Ville Vaisanen - brace yourself, because this may come as a shock - Town's Finnish trialist Ville Vaisanen won't be playing. Cuh, eh? Something about he couldn't get a flight over from Finland, which begs the question of in what sense, exactly, he has actually been on trial with Town - perhaps some sort of e-trial, conducted via the internet - but the ways of football people are not for non-football people such as you and I to know, my dear. Simon Ramsden, Stacy Coldicott, Michael Reddy, Ashley Sestanovich and Darren Mansaram, however, are all named in a strong-looking squad to face Boston's seconds at home in, ooh, just a few minutes' time.

In other news this day, GTFC are hoping for more bloody stupid Mexican waves for the visit of Oxford this Friday, as the club has decided to do the two free kids offer again; we seem to have let a future Welsh international slip through the net; Colin Cramb's financial situation - originally reported in this column on 8 October - has nothing to do with the courts, as it is the responsibility of the Official Receiver to advertise bankruptcy and issue a notice to creditors within a statutory time limit of 12 weeks; and some former Town players scored at the weekend. Bah.

Finally, then, an email from Chris Howes, who observed in the run-up to the weekend's proceedings at Huish Park some team news from the BBC which reported: "Kevin Gall, Adrian Caceres, Andrejs Stolcers or Michael Rose could fill the void created by winger Gavin Williams' move to West Ham." Chris asks simply: "How big was that bloke?" Not sure, but if the hole is still there then Rob Jones might be able to step in.