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Diary - Thursday 1 February 2007

1 February 2007

Maybe he should have treated the preposterous notion of sacking Alan Buckley with the contemptuous silence it deserves, but Positive John Fenty just can't resist maintaining a healthy dialogue with the fans/dignifying any old drivel with a response (delete as applicable to the sort of mood you're in). In fairness to the chairman, his latest outpouring to the Grimsby Telegraph explains patiently and precisely why giving Buck the chop now would constitute an even greater folly than his dismissal in 2000: because, as we pointed out here in the Diary earlier this week, it is precisely Town's constant chopping and changing over the past five years that has brought the club to its knees. I know everyone's entitled to their opinion and all that, but anyone who can't see this is quite clearly an irredeemable dipshit of the first water.

Besides managerial stability, another prerequisite for avoiding relegation is players who give at least a tinker's cuss for the club. It is for this reason that the Diary's sore eyes welcome the sight of Matty Bloomer - and because he played well in that loan with the Mariners last season. After returning to Blundell Park yesterday from relegation-threatened "Conference high-flyers" Cambridge United, Blooms went straight to the Telegraph to do the old 'this is a good squad and all that's stopping us climbing up the league is the fact that we're playing really badly' thing, but if I'm ever going to give that set-piece interview some credit, it's when the player concerned is a local lad who rates the manager and still lives in Grimsby.

Failing that, Alan Pouton might have been near enough - but Gillingham's former Town midfielder, who nearly returned to BP last summer, has been forced to retire at the age of 30 by his ongoing knee problems. Without this injury Pouton might have made it into history as a Mariners great rather than just a Mariners very good; either way it's an almighty shame, and either way he'll be remembered fondly as a genuine Grimsby player who turned in some defiantly barnstorming performances as clouds began to gather over the club. If the rest of the team had put in as much effort as he did, Town might still have been a second-flight club today.

Still, at least Al will be able to get out on the piss whenever he likes now - which is not always possible for the active professional footballer. An email to the Diary from Jon Green gives a glimpse of the difficulties faced by Town's finest when they try to enjoy the kind of social pleasures the rest of us take for granted. "I saw Luton's Michael Reddy out on the lash the other week," writes Jon. "In Baluga he couldn't be bothered to walk to the main toilets so he went to try to use the disabled one, to which my friend shouted: 'I'm not surprised you're using that one the amount of time you spend injured you twat.' Very funny, I thought. Then his shameful attempt to pull a girl I know in O'Neills. He stroked her face, offered himself by gesturing his hand from his head downwards with a kind of seductive look on his face. The girl then nearly wet herself with laughter and gave him a look of sheer pity. Finally, him on his hands and knees over the toilet throwing up. It's all glitz and glamour in the life of a fourth division footballer!" Well, Jon, at least he wasn't playing the next day. We'd never see that sort of behaviour from a professional footballer just before he represents his club on the pitch, would we?

Next in the Diary's inbox, Steve Hull writes: "It's interesting how the appointment of Michel Platini as president of UEFA has gone unreported on the OS. I would have thought GTFC would at least ask him to endorse the Fentydome." Perhaps, Steve, but the ambition displayed by the new stadium has been a little blunted by Platini's pledge to limit England to three places in the Champions League.

One last thing before I hand you over to tomorrow's guest diarist, and speaking of the Fentydome, the OS's report on Town reserves' 1-0 win at Doncaster yesterday shows that GTFC have truly joined the modern age in prioritising stadiums ahead of football. If you haven't read it, here it is.