Cod Almighty | Diary

Diary - Friday 4 September 2009

4 September 2009

Now then, folks - it was seven years ago this week that Phil Jevons went on loan to Hull - a team claimed to be going places. And they did go; and now they've been, and are on the way back. Your Guest Diarist, the regular reader will know, is prone to nostalgia - often unable to remember to whom we lost last week, but readily able to point out who played at teatime on the Saturday at Bardney (when it finally stopped raining) or that Dave Worthington once sold him an ice cream in the days when footballers never got paid over the summer break. It was bad starts that brought 2002 to mind - this when we just couldn't score against anybody under forgotten hero Paul Groves. But cheer up, then we got Kabba and Santos - people who worked their socks off and demonstrated the art of scoring and the art of the violent two-footed lunge as twin strategies to avoid relegation.

Nowadays we still get folk sent off, but for pulling opponents back to their feet (too briskly, I expect) and for pushy, shovey arguing and so on. Diary reader Phil Watson has penned this from the staffroom at lunch time: "No word yet on any club disciplinary measures against the two berks who have ruled themselves out of the next three games, thus condemning us to three tame goalless defeats? I would hope that their wages would be stopped for that period at least. If I were to be suspended from teaching for thumping a student (and I know just which one it would be...) then it's unlikely that my pay cheque would still come through, so why should footballers be different?" Having listened to Mike Newell on the Mariners Player (hi-fi and high-fives) subscription channel, Phil, I can confirm that he made no reference whatsoever to punishing Conlon or Proudlock. You'd think they'd at least have to write out a hundred lines.

The supporters' trust has updated its web page again. You almost have to check it every week these days, as the febrile new bunch of recently elected board members co-opt new hombres to their gang. The latest is none other than Simon Wilson - a man known to these pages as someone who has great ideas, can colour brilliantly without ever going outside the lines and is prone to coming up with paragraphs like this: "Recently, supporting Town hasn't been the biggest barrel of laughs. When the 'credit crunch' bit, Town fans had already endured a spell of misery long enough that a bit of belt-tightening was something we'd dreamed of upon a certain left-back's neck for a number of seasons. And that's just on the pitch." Man, that second sentence just takes your breath away. Literally. A man in a hurry is just what the trust needs, we hope.

Port Vale are a hard-working close-'em-down fast sort of side who have seen off both Sheffield clubs in cup games this season, and who only dropped two points away at Hereford after two daft mistakes late on. To be honest they are far too good for the likes of Town in our present state. Mind you, I said that before we went to Bury. Newell has more or less said he is picking a team to try to grab a point so don't be surprised if we don't line up 4-4-2. With Conlon and Proudlock suspended and Akpro, Jarman, Forbes, Bore and Hegarty all still injured it comes as a slightly unexpected relief to discover that our latest injuree, Atkinson (hamstring), has ready-made replacements in Linwood or Heywood. The former hasn't done anything wrong on the pitch for Town (yet) and deserves a go, I reckon.

Newell talking about the Welshman, said: "He knows what he is capable of", while Jones the slip told the Telegraph he is raring to go, would love the chance to play down the middle, but just wants a game. The Town fans I asked can't get past his, his sheer puniness. No doubt Newell will toss him to the lions when two or three down with 20 minutes to go. Oh for the choice of Kabba or even Mansaram (who scored away on his debut at Brighton seven years ago). See yer.