Cod Almighty | Diary

Diary - Thursday 3 September 2009

3 September 2009

If you forgot your swimming kit you got to play rounders with the girls. This is how your Guest Diarist, standing in for a work-flooded Mr Diary, learnt to step up to the plate and ask the girl at third base if she was going to the boarders' disco on Saturday. A hell of a game, rounders, and a hell of a snog to look forward to, but I never even really fancied her actually. It was just something to say.

This is pretty much how North and Jones must be seeing the prospect of playing together up front on Saturday. Danny, who has recently gone on record saying how much he likes playing off a big fellow, has got the sylph-like Welsh creature who seems to throw like a girl instead. Jones is, joking apart, a lightweight dance partner, even for a Mary Hopkin number. Ask him to do the Resurrection Shuffle as we must (early September notwithstanding) and the chances of him going all the way appear on the slim side.

Meanwhile, manager Newell has told the Telegraph: "Sometimes it works out and sometimes it doesn't, and you have to hold your hands up and cut your losses." Which is franker an admission than we would have got from 95 per cent of football managers. And that's 200 words - all you are getting until tomorrow, gentle reader, when I will be back to torment you with more bad news as the next hard match draws ever closer. By the way, I think Newell was talking about poor young Forecast, not himself. See yer.