Cod Almighty | Diary

If I had the money I'd buy Copa Mundials

7 January 2015

It's your London Diary's first entry of the new year and being brutally honest, I wish we were still in 2014. Specifically, 25-27 December; I was happy then. We were good at football, there was food at your disposal and more importantly, there was stuff to write home about. The only thing to really write home about today is the fact that Danny Parslow has extended his loan with us until the rest of the season.

The 29-year-old Welsh defender/holding man has been with us since September in various positions while our more regular and contractually obliged defence have been in and out and shaking it all about. I think that having 'Pars' (this is a guess, but I'm 87 per cent certain that's his go-to football nickname) until the end of the season is probably a good thing, as he's arguably the fourth best defender we have at the moment. I genuinely, and probably naively, think that the trio of Pearson, Magnay and Nsiala is one of the strongest in the league and with the re-addition of Parslow, we could have the tightest back four in the horrifically-named-sponsored Conference Premier.

It's now a case of them staying fit, and not chucking it about and getting suspended. And, probably more importantly, not letting in any goals. It's simple stuff really. I could probably be a manager if I was bothered to get dressed and leave the house.

Having spoken to a few people about whether we should sign players on loan in the transfer window, I've been met with mixed views. Some reckon we should so as to stick a rocket up the arses of the current players and get them competing for a place in the squad. But if you look at recent short-term signings, that is the opposite of what has happened.

That Nicky Walker lad we had the other week wasn't even given a pair of shorts. Rhys Oates didn't really make an impact that had anyone staying in the boot room after hours to look keen, spitting on their garish green Golas like their life depended on it. Hamish Watson, albeit in a slightly different situation, probably hasn't kept any of the other players awake at night, scared of watching Lord Of The Rings for fear of sitting in the stands.

It's looking unlikely that we're going to bring in Khedira or Defoe in the next few weeks – sorry to break that to you – so we need to look at what we've got. Or more to the point, we need to shout at what we've got. Someone needs to tell them that aside from our goalkeeper, they're all unemployed as of the end of the season and we need to get back to getting out of this league. Please.