Cod Almighty | Postbag
Postbag: it goes up to 11
27 July 2005
Tis the season to take holidays - la la la la la la la la la. And that's exactly where I've been and am going again. In the meantime, here's three weeks worth of postbags to entertain you through the boring pre-season preamble.If you want to eventually see something on these pages that resembles something you once wrote many weeks ago whilst bored at work, please send it to postbag@codalmighty.com and Jim'll fix it for you. And you. And you. And - da de daaaaaa
Lick my love pump
No, I'm not calling you 'Shirley' but surely the piece about Shrewbury Town should have had a mention of the bass player in Spinal Tap? Didn't he wear a Shrewbury Town shirt in the film?
from Ian Jackson
Letters Ed responds: Ah but we did that reference last season.
Intravenus De Milo
Do any of your letters ever come via post?
from Miss B
Letters Ed responds: None. Never. Ever. And I know what your next question is going to be.
Shark sandwich
Still nothing to add regarding footy, but was interested to know how my recipe for strawberry cheesecake goes down with the readers. This is not from the web, Delia or anywhere else other than my own mind.
Take 50:50 mix of digestives and ginger nuts, crush 'em and add melted margerine/butter to produce the crunchy base mix. Compact into the bottom of the tin and refrigerate so it can set hard. Meanwhile, pulp your fresh strawberries and blend into cream cheese (smooth stuff, don't confuse with cottage cheese).You might find an electric whisk is handy. Cool this mix a little and then smooth over the top of the biscuit base. Cool again so it can set further.
Either serve it plain, or put a thin layer of dark chocolate over the top and allow to set for a tasty crunch to the top surface.
I haven't tried it like I have effectively dictated it Barbara Cartland stylie, so would be intrested to know if it works. What's that you ask about quantities? OK, some biscuits, a bit of butter, tub of cream cheese, bag of strawberries easy this isn't it?
from Ian Jackson
Letters Ed responds: Dear God - is it August yet?
Hell hole
Nickmariners, where abouts do you live? Maybe we should meet up on West India Quay for a swift half.
from Francis Gugally
Letters Ed responds: How romantic
The majesty of rock
Your rough guide to Oxford neglects to mention that the delectable first lady of words, Susie Dent, lives in the city. Tut, tut. She could take me in the dictionary corner any time.
from Harry Wordsworth
Tonight I'm gonna rock ya tonight
Re: Posh Rough Guide. This is one of the best summaries I have read about our predicament from a supporter of another club. Most of them are on the lines of "Fry what a character he is". A lot of Posh fans despise him for frittering away our youth policy and the tangible assets it produced (Simon Davies, Matthew Etherington etc.); for selling or giving the ground to his property developer mate; for insulting the fans; and for being without any doubt the most tactically inept buffoon ever to be a league manager.
If Mark Wright had taken over at Christmas we would have stayed up, but then any inanimate object you could name would have done better than the fat tosspot.
from Eric Halibut
Letters Ed responds: In summary: Barry Fry bad.
Bitch school
Having visited your dump of a ground and Town I find it hard to believe you can give us such a slating. Also the football you played at the Deva last season was almost indentical to ours. So take off those fish covered specs and look around before slagging off the greatest and richest city of the north.
from Chester Til I Die
Letters Ed responds: If it is the richest city of the north, can you ask them to pay a bit more money for your education so I don't have to edit any other missives you may send in my direction. Tell them to start on punctuation and spelling.
Listen to the (flower people)
So now the club are selling player's shirts before they sign? It's merchandising gone mad!
from Marnix Kolder
Stonehenge
I have to take my hat off to those lads. Last night's commentary was a breath of fresh air. Some of the comments were in turn hilarious and insightful. You could feel the game through those boys, which is more than can be said for the usual commentators.
How did they end up holding the mikes? And is this going to be a regular gig? I would get a subscription to Mariners World if it was.
from Dave Chambers
Letters Ed responds: For those that don't know, Dave is referring to CA's Simon Wilson and Tony Butcher doing the commentary for the Sheffield Wednesday match. They filled in as a favour to the club as there was no-one else available. They may do more in the future if requested.
Gimme some money
Just thought that the Billy Turley fanclub may like to know that he has moved on from outside of Woolies in Rushden, and was spotted between the sticks last night, bawling at the Oxford United defenders, for it is there that he is now employed. Alas, he was unable to prevent his side from losing 2-0 to Southern League Western Division side Brackley Town, despite saving a penalty.
Scouting report for Grimsby game. McCleary was very quick on the left wing, and big centre-backs Roget and Oldfield looked useful. The rest were rubbish!
from Andy Lumbard
Big bottom
Has Steve Meek got an irrational fear of chives? I'm sure I saw him wandering about in a lab coat on our TV screens in the early 90s...?
from Paul Wright